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Why talking to God changes when you realize how much He loves you
Growing up, my family had a chore chart.
Color-coded.
Unload the dishwasher.
Take out the trash.
Dust upstairs.
Dust downstairs.
Clean the bathroom.
And if I’m being honest, I hated it. I mean, what kid would like it though?
We sometimes would get a little allowance of like 5 or 10 dollars when the week was over if we did all our chores. But looking back, I don't know if it was worth it at all.
My siblings and I would bribe each other to do our chores. We’d do the absolute bare minimum just to get by. Why? Because that’s what people do with chores.
You avoid them.
You rush through them.
You do just enough to say you did it.
And if we’re honest… a lot of us treat prayer the exact same way.
We know we’re “supposed” to pray.
We know Christians should pray.
We know people at church talk about prayer all the time.
So prayer becomes another spiritual chore.
Another box to check.
Another thing to feel guilty about if we forget or don't do it right.
But here’s what changed everything for me:
Prayer Is Not a Chore, It’s building a Relationship with someone who already loves me.
Prayer is not God assigning homework.
Prayer is God inviting you to know Him.
He doesn’t want the polished, church version of you.
He doesn’t want fake spiritual language.
He doesn’t want your life after you figure it all out.
He wants the real you.
The stressed you.
The confused you.
The frustrated you.
The joyful you.
The version of you that doesn’t even know how to explain what you’re feeling.
Psalm 145:18 says:
“The Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth.”
Here's how I summarize that: God is not distant.
Nothing You Carry Is Too Small for God
Some people don’t pray because they think:
“God has bigger things to worry about.”
Others don’t pray because they think:
“This is too messy for God to want to deal with.”
God Gets Closer When You’re Hurting
A lot of people disappear when life gets messy.
They’re around when things are fun.
But when life gets hard?
When life gets complicated?
They pull away.
God doesn’t.
Psalm 34:18 says:
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
God does not step back from your pain.
He steps closer.
Let that sink in.
The moments you feel most broken are often the moments God is nearest.
Stop Editing Yourself Before You Pray
Too many people think they need to clean themselves up before talking to God.
They think:
“Once I get my life together, then I’ll pray more.”
“Once I stop struggling, then I’ll come to God.”
“Once I figure this out, then I’ll talk to Him.”
No.
You bring the mess to Him.
Psalm 62:8 says:
“Pour out your hearts before Him; God is our refuge.”
Pour out your heart.
The real version.
Because prayer is not performance.
It is a relationship.
Final Thought
If prayer has felt boring… forced… awkward… or like another thing on your Christian to-do list.
Maybe it’s because you’ve been viewing it as a chore instead of what it really is:
An invitation from a loving Father who wants to hear from you.
So talk to Him.
About the heavy things.
About the random things.
About the things you don’t understand.
About the things you can’t stop thinking about.
Because prayer is not a chore.
It’s you building a relationship with a God that knows you fully and loves you completely.
My siblings and I would bribe each other to do our chores. We’d do the absolute bare minimum just to get by. Why? Because that’s what people do with chores.
You avoid them.
You rush through them.
You do just enough to say you did it.
And if we’re honest… a lot of us treat prayer the exact same way.
We know we’re “supposed” to pray.
We know Christians should pray.
We know people at church talk about prayer all the time.
So prayer becomes another spiritual chore.
Another box to check.
Another thing to feel guilty about if we forget or don't do it right.
But here’s what changed everything for me:
Prayer Is Not a Chore, It’s building a Relationship with someone who already loves me.
Prayer is not God assigning homework.
Prayer is God inviting you to know Him.
He doesn’t want the polished, church version of you.
He doesn’t want fake spiritual language.
He doesn’t want your life after you figure it all out.
He wants the real you.
The stressed you.
The confused you.
The frustrated you.
The joyful you.
The version of you that doesn’t even know how to explain what you’re feeling.
Psalm 145:18 says:
“The Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth.”
Here's how I summarize that: God is not distant.
God Actually Wants to Hear From You
Think about how wild that is.
The God who created galaxies wants to hear what’s on your mind.
Not because He has to.
Because He wants to.
1 John 3:1 says:
“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!”
Lavished means excessive. Overflowing. Without holding back.
That's how God loves me.
Think about how wild that is.
The God who created galaxies wants to hear what’s on your mind.
Not because He has to.
Because He wants to.
1 John 3:1 says:
“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!”
Lavished means excessive. Overflowing. Without holding back.
That's how God loves me.
AND
That’s how God loves you.
And when you understand that, prayer changes.
Because when you know someone loves you, talking to them stops feeling forced.
And when you understand that, prayer changes.
Because when you know someone loves you, talking to them stops feeling forced.
Nothing You Carry Is Too Small for God
Some people don’t pray because they think:
“God has bigger things to worry about.”
Others don’t pray because they think:
“This is too messy for God to want to deal with.”
Or
"I don't deserve to be answered by God."
All three are incredibly wrong.
God is powerful enough to handle the biggest crisis in your life.
AND He is personal enough to care about the smallest thing bothering you.
If it matters to you, it matters to Him.
Matthew 11:28 says:
“Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
Here's how I would summarize that: Jesus says bring it to me.
Not just the big stuff.
Not just the spiritual stuff.
All of it.
All three are incredibly wrong.
God is powerful enough to handle the biggest crisis in your life.
AND He is personal enough to care about the smallest thing bothering you.
If it matters to you, it matters to Him.
Matthew 11:28 says:
“Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
Here's how I would summarize that: Jesus says bring it to me.
Not just the big stuff.
Not just the spiritual stuff.
All of it.
God Gets Closer When You’re Hurting
A lot of people disappear when life gets messy.
They’re around when things are fun.
But when life gets hard?
When life gets complicated?
They pull away.
God doesn’t.
Psalm 34:18 says:
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
God does not step back from your pain.
He steps closer.
Let that sink in.
The moments you feel most broken are often the moments God is nearest.
Stop Editing Yourself Before You Pray
Too many people think they need to clean themselves up before talking to God.
They think:
“Once I get my life together, then I’ll pray more.”
“Once I stop struggling, then I’ll come to God.”
“Once I figure this out, then I’ll talk to Him.”
No.
You bring the mess to Him.
Psalm 62:8 says:
“Pour out your hearts before Him; God is our refuge.”
Pour out your heart.
The real version.
Because prayer is not performance.
It is a relationship.
And God is our refuge. Our safe place. How many truly safe places do you have? Where you can go with anything and everything. Without fear of shame or condemnation, without people pulling away or loving you less.
God is our safe place.
Final Thought
If prayer has felt boring… forced… awkward… or like another thing on your Christian to-do list.
Maybe it’s because you’ve been viewing it as a chore instead of what it really is:
An invitation from a loving Father who wants to hear from you.
So talk to Him.
About the heavy things.
About the random things.
About the things you don’t understand.
About the things you can’t stop thinking about.
Because prayer is not a chore.
It’s you building a relationship with a God that knows you fully and loves you completely.
There is no color coded christian chore chart. God isn't waiting for you to complete every task before you get your allowance. We got our allowance already. God loves you, He saves you, and He’s waiting for you and me to talk to him.
-Isaac Fehlen
Youth Pastor
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